Birthday Ruminations Part 1

By Juhi Bansal

One of my favourite books this year in my reading challenge has been “What Alice Forgot” by Liane Moriarty. The protagonist, 40 year old Alice loses her memory in an accident and wakes up thinking she is 30 years old. What follows is a funny and heart touching tale of her coming to terms with how much she’s changed over the years.

As I turn a year older today, I thought I’ll take this opportunity to look back 5 years ago (when I was still in my twenties- barely though!) and see if I have changed at all and how.

I realized my patience level is dwindling by the day. I cannot sit for long coffee meet ups (unless it’s with K-on a date night and the coffee is replaced by something stronger 😉 ), spas are completely out of question (something that was my religion till a few years ago) and I am even hurrying my pedicurist up all the time in a measly 30 min session every month! I guess all things “Express” were designed especially for me.

I do not care what others think of me at all. Similarly, I will not judge you for how you choose to live your life. I’ve realized I have one life and I can’t be living it as per others’ expectations of me. I do not put up shows any more. Ofcourse I am not insensitive to people’s feelings and emotions, just that your opinion of me doesn’t drive my actions anymore.

I am not a hoarder any more. Less is More is my mantra. I shop very very sparingly. Also, I do not hold onto old stuff now (if I haven’t used anything in the last 3 years- out it goes). While it does result in getting rid of precious things like my size 6 D&G denims (sob sob)- I have learnt to let go, move on and in most cases get more wear out of my stuff.

I was a complete monochromes girl at one point. But my favourite color is BLACK– I would announce very proudly if someone raised an eyebrow. Then slowly I started moving to colours (lots of them!) and for a few years kicked black completely out of my wardrobe. And, now? Now- I am a proud experimenter! I have no favourite colours, silhouettes, cuts or styles. I love maxis as much as short dresses, pink as much as grey and flats as much as stilettoes. I don’t believe in body types, shapes or skin tones. I seriously believe you can make anything work!

I used to be a very self absorbed person. I still am to some extent but with Iy, life has taken a full circle. Keeping someone else’s needs before yourself, letting go of your own book to read “Goodnight Moon”, hugs and kisses from your baby girl defining your high point of the day (and you’ve accomplished some serious sh** at work!) – this is what true love must feel like! (Sorry K 😉 but don’t forget this!)

Some of these changes may come across as good, some bad but I know for a fact that most of them are transient. I may feel very differently at 40 and I am completely ok with that. All of us change, isn’t that the only constant?

Here are few pics from my escapades in the last few weeks.